I still have one more day before weekend...*sigh* I am feeling so sleepy and lethargic..I nid a good rest..just this morning when I was about to go to work, Mom knocked on my door..I was wondering what's the matter and as usual..its about money..
Mom : Kakak, when's your payday?
Me : Err..next week,why?
Mom : Can you help me,please, to pay for the phone bills? *pitiful look*
Me : *paused* Ok..how much?
Mom : About $100 lah, not too much..thanks *walks off*
I felt sad..Mom can spend all the money she has on herself,on unnecessary stuffs and when it comes to family responsibilities, it has always been ME..the one who had to suffer..this is only her, I am expecting my Dad to suddenly come to me and ask the similar thing - MONEY..Some says money can buy everything,some says its not true..what can I say? MONEY is the root of evil..it kills..worst than a poison..at least a poison U know its dangerous and can avoid taking it..but MONEY...U can't run away from it..almost in our everyday life involves the circulation of MONEY.. I remembered ABBA's song got something like " Money..money..money..money.."
*sigh* How am I gonna have my own savings? I can juz imagine myself being a spinster..I had given up all my life savings to my last brother whose's in Primary One...and I mean ALL..ever since I was young till late..My dad took my money and put it into my youngest brother's account..Reason: He's young,no money so must sacrifice.. I was damn shocked to know about it..I mean my dad & I had joint accounts and he took all my money without my permission..giving me only $50 as the balance..what can $50 be compared to the thousands I had all my life? Luckily I didn't get married..otherwise I'd see myself hanging loosely on some trees..*faintz*
I wanted to speak up but I dare not..I dun wanna be labelled as a rude child, anak derhaka..I have always been abiding their wishes..I am now expecting Mom to come to me again and take all my savings to spend for this coming Raya...leaving me with null value in my bank..it happened before and shall too,again..goodness..I wish I can disappear before she comes knocking on my door again..It's not that I am stingy but at least, have a kind heart to think about my welfare..I am most unhappy when I had to pay school fees of my first young bro...when he barely attends school...I still have his school's warning letters with me...I advised him and he didn't listen..Nope..my bro didn't know that I had to pay for his fees..all he knows is ask Mom..and Mom asks me..Am I the leader of the family? Do I have to do all these? What do I gain in return? I gain to be responsible in life,that I know but I am not happy because I learn to be responsible while others the oppposite..life is fair but people that lead their lives live it unfairly..not only to themselves but others...how selfish.. I shall try to endure...coz I shall go away soon..so its juz a matter of time..and I hope time will past very fast and I will be off on my way,leaving them behind..good luck till then..
